The Other Half of Happiness by Ayisha Malik

Author:Ayisha Malik
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Zaffre Publishing
Published: 2017-04-05T04:00:00+00:00

10.25 a.m. I realise this isn’t about me but what do you wear to see your stepson and husband’s ex-wife for the first time?

3.30 p.m. Conall spoke in monosyllables. Walking into the hospital, I grabbed his hand – practically cracked one of my knuckles. Mary and Colm walked behind us.

We turned a corner into a room splashed with reds, blues, oranges and greens. Claire was sitting with Eamonn, looking over his shoulder as he played with his iPad. I watched her, looking so calm and sad. This was the woman Conall had once loved, had a child with, married and left. She was betrayed by the man whose hand I held and it made me wonder how much a person can really change? The old Conall must still be there, inside, caged in the confines of his own principles that were perhaps waiting to burst under the weight of reality. Eamonn’s hair was as curly and black as Claire’s was straight and blonde. Conall let go of my hand.

‘They’ve got a new reading area for children then,’ commented Mary.

Claire stood up, tapping the iPad as Eamonn put it away. Her floral dress swayed as she stepped towards me.

‘Hi,’ she said, putting out her small hand.

‘Hi,’ I replied, shaking it.

We stared at each other for a fraction longer than seemed necessary. Conall was already kneeling in front of Eamonn. ‘How’re you doing, kid?’

‘Got to level eight on Clash of Clans.’

Colm went and sat next to him. ‘Get it out then. Let’s see what you got.’

Eamonn glanced at his mum. She nodded as he picked up the iPad again.

‘First say hello to the lady,’ she said to him.

I smiled at him as he got up and shook my hand.

Mary cleared her throat. ‘Isn’t that a lovely jumper you’re wearing,’ she said, kissing him on his head.

What am I doing here? I caught Claire looking at me as I decided to join in the jumper-complimenting session.

But then Eamonn looked up at Conall, and with a familiar look of focus said, ‘Dad –’

The word was a jolt. But even more so was Conall’s response to it; slipping into a role after a nine-year absence. Claire folded her arms and watched them as Eamonn asked when Conall was going to teach him to box with his new boxing gloves. When did Conall get him boxing gloves? Eamonn glanced at Claire.

‘Mam told me not to tell you, but she’s already shown me. I could throw a right jab and knock Grandpa out right now.’

Mary and Colm laughed as Conall looked at Claire. ‘I bet she did. Your ma always had a good right hook.’

‘Tattle-tale,’ she said, ruffling Eamonn’s hair. Her hand rested on the back of his neck. ‘It’s always paid for me to know how to fight,’ she added.

And there it was: a look between her and Conall that only two people with a shared history can have. It wasn’t as if the ground had been taken from beneath my feet, but something was slipping away.

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